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mama's drama

On September this year It will my 19th year of being married. How time flies my eldest will be 18 my other son will be 16 next month, they are growing up so fast and there are times they are out with their friends just like their father and Iam left alone in the house.

No more feeding bottles, no more nappies, and no more cribs in the house, I dont buy toys anymore they ask for colognes, shaving creams and things for grown ups. We used to share rooms, 2 big beds in our room for the 5 of us, when my 2 boys ask for their own room, It was the start... my boys are growing up! When I go to malls they cry when they are not with me, now I beg for them to come with me and lot of times I go out alone. I used to decide what shirt they will wear, what kind of shoes to buy, now they dont agree with my "taste" anymore. Last month my eldest was picked up from our house by his friend who has a car to spend a night in a resort, and I just realized my son has his own world, his own life, his own peers and no body can stop it, I know this will happen but I did'nt know It will be this soon.

When they were small somebody told me.. enjoy your kids, so little time to be with them, one day they will be gone and make their own life in this world. It is so true!

On the other hand, when they were small our relationship is mother and child, now we can talk like friends, we laugh, we argue like grown ups.

I have read an article about the wives putting their children first before the husband, Iam one of them, the article said husband/wife should be the priority because one day the children will leave the house for their own family and the 2 of you will be left. It's true is'nt? In my case, hayyy I think Iam only one in this family who has'nt established or not prepared and still not preparing when the time comes, Ive been very busy with my kids, husband, house and forget to communicate with other people outside the family like my friends who has been trying to find time to spend with me but I always say Iam very busy. My husband is doing very good with his job he is a manager of a co. and sorrounded with people who "needs" his attention and time, so many birthdays, fiesta, and more gatherings to attend to, which he said he cannot say "no". When he is the house he is always tired, no time to hear my stories with what happen to me the whole day Iam in the house.

Sometimes I regret I let other people decide for me, well that is the filipino tradition, I hate it! I thought it was the right thing to do, it was not.

Now, my sentiment is.... what am I going to do with my life after motherhood?


autumn said...

oh my. i don't want to think about that yet. my daughter will be turning 6 on Sept. she's growing too fast as well. she's still like a baby for me. but you're right, time flies so fast, and i'll never know, she's already a grown up. =[

Anonymous said...

My mom says the same, she says she will treat me as a chikd all her life )))